The Ugly Honest Truth Part 1.

The ugly honest truth is if he hasn’t committed yet, he probably never will.

The truth is when he says he doesn’t want a relationship, what he’s really saying is he doesn’t want one with you.

The ugly honest truth is if he says he’s not ready or the timing is not right, you’ll find yourself waiting a while for him as he makes up excuses.

The ugly honest truth is if you give him the benefits of a relationship before you have a relationship, it’s always going to stay casual.

The truth is just because you have a long history, it doesn’t mean there will be a future.

The ugly honest truth is if he really liked you, he’d want you to be with him and only him.

The truth is a label doesn’t scare him, what scares him is a label with you.

The ugly honest truth is when he says he’s busy, that’s his way of saying he doesn’t care enough to make you a priority.

The ugly honest truth is when you bring up meeting his friends or family and he dodges the question or tells you soon what he’s really saying is, he hasn’t told them about you.

The honest truth is when he says he doesn’t want to ruin something good or what you guys have already going, what he’s really saying is there are other girls in the picture.

The ugly honest truth is when he tells you he can’t be your plus one, what he’s really saying is he doesn’t want people to think you’re a thing.

The ugly honest truth when you guys run in constant circles, it isn’t a sign you are meant to be, it’s life’s way of trying to teach you a lesson you aren’t learning. Life will keep giving you the same pop quiz until you pass it.

The honest truth is every time he cancels, makes up excuses and says sorry for the way he’s acted, he’s not really sorry, he just knows he’s been an ass.

The ugly honest truth is every time you accept less than you deserve, you’re telling him ‘it’s okay to treat me this way.’

The honest truth is every time he tells you he’ll leave her for you, that’s never going to happen and you’ll always be some side chick.

The ugly honest truth is if he’ll cheat with you, he’ll have no problem cheating on you.

The ugly honest truth is if he says he’s one of the good ones, he probably isn’t. Good guys don’t have to say they are.

The ugly honest truth is when he says he doesn’t like games or drama, he’s probably going to create a lot of drama and fuck with your head.

The ugly honest truth when he bad mouths his exes and says they are crazy, he probably made them that way.

The honest truth is if it’s just a relationship based on texting and social media, it’ll never be something more than you emotionally boosting his ego every time you respond.

The ugly honest truth is if he’s texting you all the time, he’s probably texting a lot of other people too.

The ugly honest truth is if he’s blowing up your news feed, he’s probably doing it to a lot of other people.

The honest truth is if he doesn’t want pictures of you guys across social media, it’s probably because he doesn’t want someone to see it.

The ugly honest truth is if he’s uncertain about a lot of things in his life, he’ll never be sure of you or care to make you feel secure and safe.

The ugly honest truth is you are never going to get what you want and deserve from someone like him. Because he’s the sweet talker who says all the right things but at the end of the day, all of those words are really saying is ‘I’ll never choose you and I’ll let you continue to choose me for as long as you let this go on.’

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You Didn’t Deserve The Abuse You Endured.

Whether it was physical, emotional or mental abuse you didn’t deserve any of those things.

I don’t know why that happened to you. And I wish I could take it away. I wish I could go back in time and be there in those moments. Be strong when you couldn’t be. Be the voice when yours was silent. Be the arms that held you when the arms that should have raised a hand to you. Be the one taking each blow because I would never want to see you get hurt.

But I can’t take back what’s happened. I can’t say I understand what it felt like in those moments. I can’t own your experiences or say I get it entirely because I think even when people relate or have sympathy, your experiences are your own. How things impact and affect you isn’t within anyone else’s say or control.

The things that shaped you. The moments that turned you into exactly who you became. The horrible things that shouldn’t have happened but did…

I can tell you, you didn’t deserve what you endured.

But I see the pain behind a smile you mastered.

I still see a child in your eyes who still question all of it.

I see someone who is goal oriented and hard-working because you didn’t allow the things that had happened to you define you.

I still can’t explain any of it.

But what I do know is, you wouldn’t have turned out to be the person you are today had you not gone through some of the things you did. I wish it wasn’t pain that had to shape you into someone so beautiful. But sometimes that’s how it works. Sometimes the most beautiful people are the ones who have seen a lot of ugly things.

Beautiful people are those who know defeat, but come back winning.

Beautiful people are those who know pain and suffering and channel it into helping others.

Beautiful people are the ones who know loss, but realize with loss comes something to gain.

Beautiful people are those who know darkness so they come with a light.

Beautiful people are those who have a greater appreciation for things.

Beautiful people are those who have a greater understanding of things others can’t make sense of.

They are compassionate, gentle, emotional, and deep because of the things they’ve seen and experienced that others haven’t.

I know there are things you can’t speak of and secrets you keep as you lay down at night. Baggage from your past that grows heavy at times.

A judgment of others who don’t understand nor do they deserve to.

You don’t want their sympathy. You don’t want to have to explain. And you shouldn’t have to.

You saw things you shouldn’t have. You experienced things that weren’t fair. You learned at a young age, lessons that adults learn later on.

With tough experiences, came wisdom beyond your years.

With abuse, came empathy for others.

With silence, came understanding.

With those others who judged you harshly, came your own lack of judgment to everyone.

Without love that you deserved, came an unconditional love for others.

Through pain, came a strength of someone who overcame all of it.

There is no way to take back what has happened or help you to suddenly forget it.

But what I can say is, I’m proud of you.

I’m proud of the person you’ve become.

And someone else’s lack of love doesn’t mean there aren’t 100 other people who adore you and think you are one of the best things in their life. Because you are. And if no one has said it lately, I love everything about you even the bad parts of the things you experienced that you never should have endured in the first place.

And while the love of another could never substitute the love you might have been missing, my only hope is I can run my fingers over the scars of your past and show you there is beauty even in the darkest places of yourself.

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