Cry Pretty Lyrics.

I’m sorry, but I’m just a girl
Not usually the kind to show my heart to the world
I’m pretty good at keeping it together
I hold my composure, for worse or for better
So I apologize if you don’t like what you see
But sometimes my emotions get the best of me
And falling apart is as human as it gets
You can’t hide it, you can’t fight what the truth is
You can pretty lie and say it’s okay
You can pretty smile and just walk away
Pretty much fake your way through anything
But you can’t cry pretty
Oh no, you can’t dress it up in lace or rhinestones
It don’t matter if you’re in a crowd or home all alone
Yeah, it’s all the same when you’re looking in the mirror
A picture of pain, so let it flow like a river
You can pretty lie and say it’s okay
You can pretty smile and just walk away
Pretty much fake your way through anything
But you can’t cry pretty
You can’t turn off the flood when the dam breaks
When all your mascara is going to waste
When things get ugly, you just gotta face
That you can’t cry pretty
Oh no, you can’t
Ooh, yeah
You can’t turn off the flood when the dam breaks
When all your mascara is going to waste
When things get ugly, you just gotta face
That you can’t cry pretty
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
No, you can’t cry
No, you can’t cry
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, woo
You can’t cry
You can’t cry pretty, baby
Oh yeah, woo, woo
No, you can’t cry pretty, yeah.
#CarrieUnderwood #CryPretty
Open Topic

The Day I Killed Myself.

Road to Recovery

It was a Sunday night and I said goodbye to my coaches and teammates realizing it was the last time I’d see them, and them not realizing I was saying goodbye and not goodnight. I got home, took a shower, and said goodnight to my parents, little brother and sister, and went to bed, or so they thought.

I waited until the house was dead silent and everyone was sound asleep. I went into the medicine cabinet, grabbed every pill bottle I could see, went back to my room and popped them all into my mouth. 105 pills later I started seizing and foaming at the mouth. It was happening, it happened. I was dead.

My mom and dad found me the next morning, screaming for Jesus because they couldn’t believe their baby was gone. I ruined my family from that point on all because I was selfish enough to…

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Open Topic

What Is Beauty??

Someone caught my attention with a post they blogged about yesterday, so I said to myself “I have to blog about that.” Revolutionary Musing blogged: How We Treat Attractive People. Well, my blog is titled: “What Is Beauty?” Let me begin by saying, this post isn’t pointed at anyone particular, I’m not here to judge, ridicule, or bash anyone based on their religion, sex, color, race or gender. This is an open topic, and I’m here to start a discussion and hopefully a lot will comment, I would love to read other people’s opinions and point-of-view because this is an issue that needs to be addressed. *Remember, we are only talking about physical looks alone.*

I feel a majority of the population is judged and treated differently based off of looks alone. I totally can relate to this, and I’m sure most of you reading this can too. Let me start by saying, I totally agree with my statement. When I was in my teens to early thirties, I used to be an exotic dancer…I considered myself an average girl who is going thru some hardships, and trying to make a living. Simple, right?? Well, since I’m a blunt person I’m just going to say I was hot looking around that age. I used to get SO many guys approach me asking for my number, if I’ll go out on a date with them, even asking me if I’d have sex with them. WHAT!!?? Hell no!! First of all, I was never that type of girl and I told all these men this, some understood and accepted it…some, not so much. But oh well!! Bye bye, move on!!! Anyway, everywhere I went I had heads turning to look at me, wives/girlfriends slapping their man because they’re busy drooling over me in the check-out line, guys honking their horns as they drove pass me on the road, I had mouths drop whenever I entered the room. All this attention makes your confidence and self-esteem skyrocket. I felt like a Goddess with all the attention I received, you would’ve thought I was Jennifer Lopez or some other famous female lol. BUT, that was then…

NOW…I’m in my forties, gained a little weight around the edges, I’ve been made fun of, judged based on my weight, get less heads turning, and maybe a hurtful comment here and there. Which by the way, doesn’t bother as much anymore but it’s still hurtful. My confidence and self-esteem aren’t that high anymore. I feel like something is wrong with me, I feel I’m ugly, I feel I’m being judged, I feel I’m worthless, I feel unattractive, I feel I’m not good enough for any guy. Guys don’t approach me like they used to. All these amazing feelings I felt before are now feelings of hurt and rejection. BUT, I never considered myself all that great looking and I still don’t today but others beg to differ. Anyway, I can ramble on and on about this topic, I know some of you can argue with me about this, but I won’t. So, my point to all this is, I ask: “What is beauty??” Beauty is from the inside out, not the outside in. Anyone can paint on a pretty face, but still have an ugly soul. No one should ever judge anyone because of how they look, how they dress, how they smell, how smart or stupid they are, what color their hair is, what color their skin is, what disabilities they have, or because they have one green sock on. Whatever the reason, they’re shouldn’t be any reasons at all. NEWS FLASH: WE ALL BLEED RED!!! WE ALL ARE HUMAN!!! Not one person is better than the next, smart than the other. Every human being has feelings and feels feelings. Real beauty is not fake. Real beauty is what you experience from someone’s soul. Beauty isn’t having a pretty face. It’s about having a pretty mind, pretty heart, pretty soul, and if you want…pretty muscles too!!

There are three types of beauty: Natural Beauty, Real Beauty, and True Beauty. Natural Beauty is existing in nature and not made or caused by people, without chemical substance, antonym of artificial. Beauty: the quality of being physically attractive, give pleasure to the senses of mind. The beauty that you are born with. You receive it from both of your parents. True Beauty is reflected in one’s soul by being truthful, honest, helpful, and trustworthy. Smiling at others even when you are having a bad day, complimenting someone and meaning it, spending time with family and friends, kindness, and most importantly being the best person that you can be. Real beauty is something that you define for yourself, and follow or you aspire to follow the real beauty. For example, if for a person the real beauty is fairness, then the person will try to maintain and improve their fairness of the skin. Similarly, if for a person the real beauty is about being good and being devoid of feelings like jealousy and hatred, then the person will aspire and try to maintain such goodness. Real beauty is hard to let go. These days, with life howling around us like a hurricane, we instinctively try to hang on for dear life. To be beautiful, to live in the flow, is a monumentally important task that requires only openness, desire and a few simple actions.

This my friends, is what beauty is about…



Helping Hands Helping Others Live Sober.


“It is one of the most beautiful compensations of this life, that no man can sincerely try to help another without helping himself.”Ralph Waldo Emerson

“We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give.”Winston Churchill

“Those who bring sunshine to the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves.”Sir James Barrie

“Cling to the thought that, in God’s hands, the dark past is the greatest possession you have-the key to life and happiness for others. With it you can advert misery and death for them.”AA, 2001, p. 124

“The more I shared secrets that I thought were so awful, the more people were drawn to me and I to them. I found some serenity when I got out of the driver’s seat, I found God working in my life.”[Author Unknown]

“I sought my soul, but my soul I could not see. I sought my God, but my God eluded me. I sought my brother and I found all three.”Martin Luther King Jr.

“We had a new Employer. Being all powerful, He provided what we needed, if we kept close to Him and performed His work well. Established on such a footing we became less and less interested in ourselves, our little plans and designs. More and more we became interested in seeing what we could contribute to life.”AA, 2001, p. 63

“Self-pity becomes a stumbling block when we get so narrowly focused upon our problems. We forget we are a part of a whole throng of fellow pilgrims on this path. It helps to notice others beside ourselves who are seeking courage to live their lives.”Hazelden Publishing, 1986, p. 3

“He becomes angry, indignant, self-pitying. What is his basic trouble? Is he not really a self-seeker even when trying to be kind? Is he not a victim of the delusion that he can wrest satisfaction and happiness out of this world if he only manages well?”AA, 2001, p. 161

“Ask Him in your morning meditation what you can do each day for the man who is still sick. Give freely of what you find …”AA, 2001, p. 164

 “The alcoholic is an extreme example of self-will run riot; Above everything, we alcoholics must get rid of selfishness. God makes that possible.”AA, 2001, p. 62

“Though they knew they must help other alcoholics if they would remain sober, that motive became secondary. It was transcended by the happiness they found in giving themselves for others. They shared their homes, their slender resources and gladly devoted spare hours to fellow-sufferers.”AA, 2001, p. 159

“The problems of the community might engage attention.”AA, 2001, p. 131

“But those of us who have tried to shoulder the entire burden and troubles of others find we are soon overcome by them.”AA, 2001, p. 132

“New acquaintances who know nothing of alcoholism might be made and thoughtful consideration given their needs.”AA, 2001, p. 131

“He will be on firmer foundation than the man who is placing business or professional success ahead of spiritual development.”AA, 2001, p. 130

“You as well as your husband ought to think of what you can put into life instead of how much you can take out. Inevitably, your lives will be fuller for doing so.”AA, 2001, p. 120

“Putting these principles into action at home and at work.”AA, 2001, p. 98

“We shall be of little use if your attitude is one of bitterness or hostility.”AA, 2001, p. 103

“Search out another alcoholic.”AA, 2001, p. 96

“Helping others is the foundation stone of your recovery. A kindly act once in a while isn’t enough. You have to act the Good Samaritan every day, if need be. It may mean the loss of many nights’ sleep, great interference with your pleasures, interruptions to your business. It may mean sharing your money and your home, counseling frantic wives and relatives, innumerable trips to police courts, sanitariums, hospitals, jails and asylums. Your telephone may jangle at any time of the day or night.”AA, 2001, p. 97

“To be vital, faith must be accompanied by self-sacrifice and unselfish, constructive action.”AA, 2001, p. 93

“Cooperate, never criticize.”AA, 2001, p. 89

“Frequent contact with newcomers and with each other is the bright spot of our lives.”AA, 2001, p. 89

“Do not be discouraged if your prospect does not respond at once. Search out another alcoholic and try again. You are sure to find someone desperate enough to accept with eagerness what you offer.”AA, 2001, p. 96

“Do not think of what you will get out of the occasion — think of what you can bring to it.”AA, 2001, p. 102

“The fact is that he should work with other people to maintain his own sobriety.”AA, 2001, p. 119

“To be helpful is our only aim.”AA, 2001, p. 89

“Your job now is to be at the place where you may be of maximum helpfulness to others; so never hesitate to go anywhere if you can be helpful.”AA, 2001, p. 102

“Our common means of deliverance are effective for ourselves only when constantly carried to others”AA Today, p. 7-8

“Allowing enthusiasm to bubble up from you and pervade your very existence will bring an abundance of joy to yourself and others. It’s one of the simplest ways I can think of to serve others.”Carlson & Carlson, 2001, p. 163

“We find that we can do nothing ourselves to help other alcoholics except to tell them our own story of how we found the way out. If the other person is helped, it’s by the grace of God and not by what we do or say. “24 Hours a Day, March 12th Thought of the Day

“Shared joy is double joy, and shared sorrow is half-sorrow.”Swedish Proverb

“In the sphere of material things, giving means being rich. Not he who has much is rich, but he who gives much.”Erich Fromm

“The only really happy people are those who have learned how to serve.”Albert Schweitzer

“Your greatest life messages and your most effective ministry will come out of your deepest hurts.”Warren, 2002, p. 275

“The fragrance always remains on the hand that gives the rose.”Ghandi

“How far that little candle throws his beams!”Shakespeare, W. The Merchant of Venice.

“What would Integrity have me do?”Khamisa, 2007, p.81

“If human beings can be trained for cruelty and greed and a belief in power which comes through hate and fear and force, certainly we can train equally well for greatness and mercy and the power of love which comes because of the strength of the good qualities to be found in the soul of every human being.”Eleanor Roosevelt

“The only true voyage of discovery, the only fountain of Eternal Youth, would be not to visit strange lands but to possess other eyes, to behold the universe through the eyes of another, of a hundred others, to behold the hundred universes that each of them beholds, that each of them is.”Proust, 1932, p. 559

“The best way out of any bad situation is always the kindest way.”Roy L. Smith

“I destroy my enemy if I make him my friend.”A. Lincoln

“Your visitor is going out of his way, taking up his time, perhaps missing a pleasant evening at home or at the theatre by calling on you. His motives are two-fold: He is selfish in that by calling on you he is taking out a little more sobriety insurance for himself; and secondly, he is genuinely anxious to pass along the peace and happiness a new way of life has brought him. He is also paying off a debt — paying the people who led him to the path of sobriety by helping someone else.”AA, 1999

“I have found it of enormous value when I can permit myself to understand the other person. The way in which I have worded in this statement may seem strange to you. Is it necessary to permit oneself to understand another? I think that it is. Our first reaction to most of the statements which we hear from other people is an evaluation, or judgment, rather than an understanding of it. When someone expresses some feeling or attitude or belief, our tendency is, almost immediately, to feel That’s right; or That’s stupid; That’s abnormal; That’s unreasonable; That’s incorrect; That’s not nice. Very rarely do we permit ourselves to understand precisely what the meaning of the statement is to the other person.”Rogers, 1961, p.16

“It is pride when we feel that we are unusually well equipped to help the new man, forgetting our own early days, and overlooking the possibility that we may need help tomorrow. It is pride when we regard help to another as our good deed of the month and not as medicine for our own ailment which is only arrested and not cured.”Cleveland Central Committee of A.A.

“All true communication must be founded on mutual need. We saw that each sponsor would have to admit humbly his own needs as clearly as those of his prospect.”AA Today, p. 10

“The noblest question in the world is: ‘What good may I do in it?'”Benjamin Franklin

“Politeness and consideration for others is like investing pennies and getting dollars back.”Thomas Sowell

“They told me, ‘You’ve got to get out and work a little; you’ve got to give.’ They told me that giving was living, and living was loving, and loving was God.”AA., 2003, Experience, Strength and Hop

“AA service is anything whatever that helps us reach a fellow sufferer — ranging all the way from the Twelfth Step itself to a ten-cent phone call and a cup of coffee, and to AA’s General Service Headquarters for national and international action. The sum total of all these services is our Third Legacy.”Bill W., Letter, July 1955

“It is pride when we regard help to another as our good deed of the month and not as medicine for our own ailment which is only arrested and not cured.”AA, 1964, Misunderstanding Pt. 3, Central Bulletin, 22.

“The alcoholic is an extreme example of self-will run riot, though he usually doesn’t think so. Above everything, we alcoholics must be rid of this selfishness. We must, or it kills us!”AA, 4th Eds, p. 62

“This work kept me sober. It wasn’t a question of those alcoholics giving me anything. My stability came out of trying to give, not out of demanding that I receive.”Grapevine, January 1958

“Nothing impacts a still-suffering alcoholic more than hearing the language of the heart from another alcoholic in recovery.”51st Annual Meeting of the General Service Conference of Alcoholics Anonymous, 2001

“I think the kind of service that really counts is giving of yourself, and that almost invariably requires effort and time.”51st Annual Meeting of the General Service Conference of Alcoholics Anonymous, 2001

“Service includes practicing love, tolerance, patience and willingness, especially listening and keeping an open mind in all our affairs. We are required to give of ourselves in service to others without expecting any ‘payback’ or recovering anything in return for A.A. service.”51st Annual Meeting of the General Service Conference of Alcoholics Anonymous, 2001

“He that does good to another does good also to himself, not only in the consequence but in the very act. For the consciousness of well-doing is in itself ample reward.”Seneca

“Love cures people — both the ones who give it and the ones who receive it.”Dr. Karl Menninger

“When your burden is heaviest, you can always lighten a little some other burden. At the times when you cannot see God, there is still open to you this sacred possibility, to show God; for it is the love and kindness of human hearts through which the divine really comes home to men, whether they name it or not. Let this thought, then, stay with you: there may be times when you cannot find help, but there is no time when you cannot give help.”George S. Merriam

“If you’re not here to serve others, what is your function?”Todd Vogler

“Help thy brother’s boat across, and lo! Thine own has reached the shore.”Hindu Proverb

“Whoever survives a test, whatever it may be, must tell the story. That is his duty.”Elie Wiesel

“When your prospect has made such reparation as he can to his family, and has thoroughly explained to them the new principles by which he is living, he should proceed to put those principles into action at home.”AA, 2001, p. 98

“When we give to others, we get out of our own way enough to get a different perspective on our lives.”“Living Clean: The Journey Continues”, p. 67

“Everyone can be great because everyone can serve.”Martin Luther King Jr.

“One thing I know: The only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve.”Albert Schweitzer

good vibes
Open Topic

Unraveling A Concerto.

HA's Place

penny-byrne-vv-september-2018Image by Penny Byrne

a jukebox reality —

black rafters have been removed, for the lady
liberty has to put up a show of flower-disguised
equality, or so they call it. the weather is torn
between a rumbling thundershower and a bitter
sunshine that seems to melt the skin off, of all
the spectators.

oh, pity — they hope, they quarrel over some petty
crimes, they carry the burden of proof and safe-
guard their non-existent privacies. they are clad
in a humble blue contrary to lady’s silver linings,
awaiting the pleasure of music they would have to
stream otherwise from pirated sources. the artistic
royalties are too exorbitant for masses of idolators
or so she would often say, in her half-hearted tone,
her eyes sad for effect.

ah, encore — the song goes on, harps turn into bats,
pianofortes into eagle shrieks, every hue into pea-
cock flamboyancy —…

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