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Busy Catching Blessings, No Time To Hold Grudges.

They say that you attract what you think, which basically means you’re responsible for the things that happen to you.

Well, I disagree. I say that you can’t control your surroundings.

You can’t control everything that’s happening to and going on around you. As much as you try, bad things will happen.

You can be the most careful person in the world, but toxic people will sneak up on you.

They will find a way to lure you into their spider’s web.

You can protect your heart with all of your might but somehow, it will get broken into pieces.

No matter how loving and caring you are, there will always be people who will use you.

People who will not treat you the way you deserve to be treated, and people who will break your heart.

Whether we accept it or not, life is not always fair. There are some things you simply can’t run away from.

However, even though you can’t control the world around you, you can control the way you react.

Even though you can’t control people’s behavior, you have the power to control yourself.

So, at the end of the day, everything really is up to you.

You can decide whether to let one bad thing ruin your entire life, whether one toxic person will ruin all of your potential relationships, and whether one negative thing will destroy all the positivity.

Will you be sad because of your failed relationship?

Or you will be happy that you got rid of the man who obviously wasn’t meant to be yours?

Will you see your heartbreaks as the end of the world? Or will you be grateful for the lessons it taught you?

Will you be devastated for not getting that promotion you wanted so badly?

Or will you be thankful for having a job that puts food on the table, which is a privilege many only dream about?

Let’s look at things from this perspective: if you had 1440 dollars but someone took away one dollar, would you throw away the rest? I’m sure you wouldn’t even contemplate it.

Well, one day has 1440 minutes. Therefore, every time you allow one minute of sadness and negativity to ruin your entire day, you’re actually doing the thing mentioned above.

You’re wasting the rest of your minutes. And, I’m sure you’ll agree that time is much more valuable than money.

So, I’m begging you to change your focus.

Stop overthinking everything bad going on around you, and concentrate on the good things.

Don’t allow a moment of sadness to destroy your happiness. Don’t allow one tear to ruin all of your potential laughter and smiles.

Instead of focusing on your curses, focus on your blessings.

Be thankful for all the good things and positive people you have in your life, instead of wasting your energy on the negative.

Most importantly: forget about the past. Yes, you can and should learn from it, but you can’t change it.

There is absolutely no point in holding grudges. There is no point in replaying some previous scenarios in your head.

No point in thinking about all the what ifs. No point in being angry and resentful about some events that went the way they did.

The truth is, that you can’t do anything about it now – besides allowing your past to ruin both your present and the future.

Look around you: I bet there are many things you should be grateful for.

There are many people you should consider yourself lucky to have in your life.

Focus on these things. Focus on your blessings and the little things which can make you happy.

Don’t get me wrong: I’m not trying to minimize whatever pain you might be feeling.

I’m not trying to tell you that you’re not allowed to be angry or sad.

I’m just trying to remind you that there are people out there who would love to have your bad days.

People who are struggling in battles you can’t even imagine, and who would give everything to have your worries and hardships.
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I Am Stronger Than My Insecurities.

I know it’s cliche, but there is power in self-acceptance. In being able to look in the mirror and accept yourself for who you are.

Self-acceptance is about accepting your life for what it is, not for what you want it to be.

But it isn’t easy. Nothing worth working for is ever easy, right?

It’s easy to say “I love myself,” but at the end of the day, these are just words. It takes strength and determination to truly believe it and to be confident in spite of insecurities.

By having strength to love ourselves, flaws and all, we give ourselves the power of self-acceptance.

Everyone struggles with insecurities. Some more than others, but no one is 100% confident ALL the time. Understanding the root causes of insecurity can be helpful in figuring out how to deal with insecurities. Knowing how to deal with it is the first step to overcoming them.

I love myself, but there are days I don’t.

When I wish that I looked different or had better fashion sense, whatever that even means. When I wish I was more outgoing, or that I could actually flirt to save my life. Sometimes, I wish I was anyone other than who I am.

When these feelings creep into my mind, I have to remind myself that I am stronger than my insecurities. That what I consider to be my “quirks” are actually my biggest strengths. My looks, my personality, make me undeniably who I am. And I don’t have to be ashamed of that. I don’t have to be ashamed of who I am.

No one deserves to feel less than for simply being who they are.

We are all unique. Isn’t that amazing? Sure, we all share similarities, but at our core, there is no one else on this Earth quite like us. And when I think about that—like really, truly think about that—it’s actually really, really cool.

Growing up, I wasn’t very confident. I felt different and awkward and out of place. The funny thing is, what I didn’t realize then, is that everyone else felt the same way.

Everyone has their own battle to overcome and find self-acceptance. For some people, it’s easy. For others, it’s extremely difficult.

It’s taken me a long time to be able to look in the mirror and say that though I have my share of insecurities, I am confident, strong, and I love myself for who I am.

There is a power in being able to say that. In having strength to just live life unapologetically. To be able to say I AM ME and not worry about what others think.

I’ll be honest, it’s a daily battle. But for most people it is. Figuring out who I am and what I want out of life has helped me accept and love myself, but there’s no magic solution. It just takes time.

I’m confident, but not all the time.

I’m beautiful, but I don’t always feel that way.

I’m moving toward my dreams and goals as I try to figure this crazy life out, but sometimes it feels like I’m not going anywhere at all.

And that’s life. Some days are better than others. It’s a journey.

Life is like a novel, not a short story.

Characters take time to develop. Themes aren’t always clear until a few chapters in. I’m not even entirely sure where this plot is heading.

I’m still early on in my journey. I’m still finding my way.

But I’ve learned that’s okay.

Because everyone else is finding their way, too.

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Nothing Compares To You.

Let go of whatever and whoever hurt you. Choose to heal, choose to recover, choose happiness. You are NOT defined by the failures of your past, the people that hurt you, or the mistakes that you’ve made. You are not defined by the missed opportunities that you gave up because you were anxiously waiting for something better to arrive, that never did. You are not defined by your imperfections, insecurities, and inadequacies; they are what make you who you are, and darling, nothing compares to you.

You are more than just the continuously contemptuous demons inside your head screaming for a way out; you are more than just the insolent internal hurricanes of your self-collapsing mind and the emptiness inside your tender soul ceaselessly craving for something “more”.

You ARE allowed to feel lost, broken, and apprehensive. It’s okay not to be okay. It’s okay to feel sad and not understand why, but you do not have to sit with your damage and make a home out of it.

Do not forget the person that you were, as it is because of those inconspicuous versions of yourself that you have grown into the resilient, daring warrior that you are today. Remember the things that once made you crave so deeply for the briefest taste, yet stung with irremediable sharp pain when you got too close.

Remember your young, naïve heart and how it felt to dive head first into the waters of the unknown to love so deeply and live so avidly without limitations. Remember each and every version of yourself that you used to be and remind yourself that without all of your faults, setbacks, and failures, you’d never be half the person that you are today.

Your past does not define your future, your scars do not determine your worth, your failures do not border your undying potential—they make you dauntless and undeniably sagacious.

You are not a tormenting weed amongst perpetual beauty, you are a winter wildflower waiting patiently to blossom when the sun reaches your roots and proclaims your time to flourish. Eclipse your hindrances, unshackle the chains of your reservations, and set free your fearlessness.

Be you—unfiltered, raw, and vulnerable.

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Tired Heart.

You are allowed to be sad. You are allowed to be weak at times when you have to. You are human and you are flawed, and no one expects you to be full of bright positivity all the time. Maybe things would get worse, perhaps even heavier. But I know for a fact that all these will pass, and soon, you’ll wake up and realize your heart is strong enough to wither through its darkest nights.

I know the urge of ripping yourself apart is too strong, because the world gets too much to breathe in. The ones whom you could run to is never there for you in the ways that you need them, and the ones you used to trust have shattered all those bridges. Darling, these are some of the things that we simply can’t control in life, and whatever they did to you, is not your fault. It is tiring, so very tiring, to not have anyone be there for you the way you were for them. Sometimes, people can be disappointing.

But there are some things that won’t let us down – your favorite song, the skies, the words you write. That cup of coffee in the morning, a hug from your pet, that music from your playlist . These are things that can make our days, no matter how little they seem, somehow bearable. And that’s okay, darling. It’s a lot better than blatantly talking to a wall and expecting a pair of arms to fall into in return. You get to choose how to heal and you get to choose what heals you.

So wipe your cheeks and hug yourself. Breathe. Today is simply a day. It will never pass through you again. Once you curl yourself up to sleep and wake for dawn, you can take comfort in the fact that you’ve survived your storms for now.

Darling, I know your heart is tired. But that’s okay.

Today is just another day.

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Thing I Know Now, I Wish I Knew Then…At 16.

Dear 16-year-old me,

I’ve grown up a lot in these past few years and boy, have I learned a lot in that time. I’ve changed so much. I’ve loved. I’ve lost. I’ve cried. I’ve partied. There’s been incredible times and there’s been times when I didn’t know if I’d make it through the day. I know so much about life and about myself now, that I didn’t know then, so I’m writing to you to tell you everything I wish you knew.

1. Don’t live to work, work to live

You will spend so many hours worrying about work. About what you’re going to do—where you’re going to end up. You’ll put endless pressure on yourself to achieve and to make people proud, but in the meantime, you’ll forget to focus on things that truly make you happy.

You’re supposed to work to live—earning money to supplement a life that makes you happy. Never get in the cycle of living to work, unless your work is what truly brings you joy. You can have all the money in the world but if you’re not happy, you have nothing.

2. It’s ok to grow apart from your friends

There will be friends you have right now who you can’t ever imagine not being in your life. Sadly, you’ll grow apart from some of them. Some will change, some will have different priorities than you and some you’ll just drift apart from.

Don’t waste your time getting upset over this because it’s just a part of life. Some people don’t grow up to be who you wanted them to be and that’s fine. People grow apart; it’s sad, but it happens.

For every friend who walks out of your life, you’ll gain another incredible one at a different stage—I promise.

3. You don’t need validation from anyone but yourself

When all’s said and done, the only person you’ll have left is you.

The only person who truly needs to validate you is you. Don’t listen to fuckboys who will bring you down. Don’t listen to bitchy girls who are jealous and ignore anyone who doesn’t want the best for you.

If you’re happy, then that’s really all that matters. Pleasing you should be your number one priority.

4. It’s normal to be a little lost

There are times where you’ll feel so lost and alone with absolutely no idea where your life is headed. It will be scary and it will be hard—but here’s the secret: Absolutely everyone is lost!

You won’t realize it just yet, but everyone is in the same boat as you are, and that’s ok. Things will always work out in the end, and being lost is part of the journey.

If you don’t know what career path you want to take, what boy you like or where you see yourself next week—let alone in the next 5 years—it’s cool, you’ll work it out.

5. You’re perfect just as you are

The hours you’ll spend crying over boys hurts me to think about to this day. Thinking you’re not good enough is the worst thing you will go through, and you are—you so are good enough. You’ll do crazy fad diets trying to lose a few pounds and juice cleanses to clear your skin, and spend nights out worrying about how you look.

You are perfect and you are so loved—I promise you. The sooner you start to realize you’re amazing just as you are, the happier you will be.

You’re going to have some tough times ahead, but so many wonderful times, too. You’ll be blessed with incredible memories, and you’ll grow into someone that I think you’ll be really proud of.

Stay strong, be true to yourself, and don’t EVER Forget. Your. Worth.
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Why Do Men Love Bitches?

Alright y’all, I’m about to change things up just a tiny bit on something. We all always say that guys fall for the girl next door, right? WELL..thats not the case here…keep reading!!

I’m sorry, but I have to be explicit here. First of all, I’m not saying ALL men like bitches, but there are a few types of men that prefer them.

It seems that being a good girl doesn’t pay off sometimes. Despite having good qualities, you’re still single. Perhaps that’s because some men go after bitches instead of nice girls.

Here are some reasons why men really like bitches, so keep reading.

They love their vibe.

Whenever an Alpha Bitch enters the room, the atmosphere gets hot. Everyone notices her presence and they try to soak up her energy.

Maybe she doesn’t look like Miss World, but there is something inexplicably attractive about her. She holds her head high and her every move is sexy. Men like that, and they will immediately try to catch her attention.

Guess what? The more she acts uninterested, the more they want her.

Nice girls are not a challenge.

Sometimes “easy” means “boring”. Men are hunters, that’s in their nature. They are competitive beings, and if you tell them they can’t have something, they will not quit.

Nice girls seem to be boring because guys don’t have to make any effort to winning these girls’ hearts. Bitches have a “Hard to Get” factor, and most men are players who will not give up until they win the prize.

Nice girls will always be there for them, but bitches, won’t. Hell no, because bitches are too busy with satisfying their own needs.

They want sex, not relationships.

They get the impression that nice girls are marriage material ONLY. But, they just want to have sex, and that’s it—no strings attached, no tears, no drama!

Nice girls usually want something more than sex and physical intimacy. They want stability and real relationships filled with love and romance. Well, some men are running away from all of that.

The only thing they want is satisfying their sexual appetite, and they are more likely to get it from women who have similar thinking. Period.

Bitches are more exciting.

Some men are addicted to excitement. There is no room for boredom in their lives, and they look for someone who can keep up with their crazy lifestyle.

Men are attracted to bitches because they are independent and free-spirited. These man-eaters don’t ask for anyone’s approval; They just do whatever they want, and that’s something which makes them so exciting.

You never know their next step; they are so unpredictable. That certainly leaves men hungry for more.